THE LANGUAGE WE USE IN OUR CONVERSATION COUNTS A LOT
While passing through a marketplace, I observed two fruit hawkers. There was a huge customer traffic with one hawker whereas there was none with other. I was curious to know the reason for this flurry of activity at one of the vends and none with other though with almost the same quality and price tag to each of fruit available for sale. I ventured to discreetly ask the idle hawker as to why no customer is coming to him. First of all, he was evasive but when pressed, his language and style of conversation gave everything out. He was very impolite, curt and disrespectful even bordering on abusive. When I started my conversation with another one, despite his business with the customers, he respectfully wished me good morning and asked me what he could give me from the fruits he was having? This spurred me in writing this blog.
CHOICE OF WORDS WE USE IS ESSENTIAL
In public speaking, the correct and appropriate use of language, the style or modulation in which we use that language, the right words and phrases we use count a lot. For instance, if we want to ask somebody; what does he want? it could be spoken with direct and raised voice or spoken with politeness. Here the choice is entirely ours. We would be known for our interaction in conversation – knowing full well that nobody wants to have business with a person impulsive temperament. Our spoken words should have magnetic attraction rather than repulsion to attract more people towards us.
STYLE OF SPEAKING
Essentially, it is also a fact that nobody wants the conversation with a person or group of people who effuse negative from the word go. We should always keep in mind that none has time to refine our language and the demeanor we exhibit. We are solely responsible for your own action or inaction and are constrained to suffer its consequences too. This is so at our own home, workplace, formal and informal institutions or in business forums. The choice of words and the language to be used exclusively depends on us. It should always be borne in mind that the words are spoken from the tongue and the arrow coming out of the bow can never be retrieved. It has to hit the target and we have to be ready to face the music if we have used revolting language.
In Bible it has been emphasized: The Lord God has given me the tongue of those who are taught, that I may know how to sustain with a word him who is weary. Morning by morning he awakens; he awakens my ear to hear as those who are taught.
WHAT WE SPEAK AND HOW YOU SPEAK COUNTS
It should also be remembered that public speaking or conversation can help us catapult to new heights of glory or pull us down to abysmally low level in any venture we put our hands on. If we are delving in business, we have to use polished and elegant language which could attract customers to us. In other words our wares and our words, both should be polished and unadulterated then only we can be the successful businessman.
BEING REACTIVE – PAYS NOTHING AT ALL
It is not that every time we would be received with open hands. At times, we have to listen to unpleasant, unprintable language or at times disgusting remarks. We have to be patient, being reactive can be disastrous for us. Wait and watch attitude makes a huge difference. If this too does not work then acceptance will work but the reaction is no solution to the unpleasant situation. We can come out of the piquant situation by remaining calm and composed. We are down but not totally out. Patience always pays whereas being reactive cannot pay at all? Giving abuse in return for an abuse can bring about no solution to the gnawing problem.
In Holy Quran it has been emphasized: He (Allah) has created man from a sperm-drop; and behold this same (man) becomes an open disputer!
REMAINING POSITIVE SHOWS US THE PATH TO SUCCESS ULTIMATELY
Positive and polished use of language in conversation can always bring positive results for us. At times, there may be some drawback or pinpricks but after sometimes positive utterances bring about positive results. This way we can save our association and connectivity with anybody and everybody. The taut and violent besides negative style of interaction is enemy number one of the relationship. It snaps our friendship with others and thus is harmful ultimately.
In Bhagwad Gita it has been mentioned that a person should remain non-violent in speech and in action, should have the purity of experience, should remain truthful ever established in knowledge and should desist from being angry while conversing or dealing with others.
Following should be kept in mind while having conversations/interactions with others:-
- Introspect before speaking – toll moll ke bol.
- Never be reactive – it could break the relationship.
- Use correct accent and cool demeanor while speaking.
- Use of correct words and phrases suiting the time and space is a must – we have to use the language the others could understand.
- Everybody, even a small kid, wants respect should never be forgotten. Pay and get respect should never be forgotten.
- The suave and cool positive language can fill warmth in our relationship.
- We want to have communication with other for our benefit therefore right use of language is a must.
- It is up to us to take our association to new heights or abysmally at the lowest levels by the use of good or bad language. The choice is with us.
- Angry use of words bring in its wake reprisals – never converse while in bad mood.
- Forgive others’ mistakes God will forgive many of ours.
OUR CONVERSATION IS MIRROR OF OUR INTERNAL MINDSET
The way we speak or converse with others counts a lot
The choice of words or phrases we use counts a great deal
Conveying our points of view in a way we want to put across
With others for communication
For understanding others’ viewpoint
Depends on our own wisdom and those of others with whom we converse
Bad communication leads to bad relationship growth
Between the two parties having confabulation
Beating about the bush or conversing without introspection
Takes our relationship to bushes
Of uncertainty and impulsive state in relationship
Impulsive use of words and phrases
Along with condemning others at their back
Backfires on us sooner than later.
Sound conversation reflects our sound mindset
Whereas scattered mindset leads to unsound dialogue
Will sometimes, lead to dull and dreary monologue
Snapping the thin fabric of our association with others.
Where so ever and when so ever we meet someone known or unknown
We should choose the right words to be spoken
Because we would be assessed according to our conversation
Words which reflect haughtiness and egocentricity
Or malicious language will bring in its wake enmity
Will earn us no friends in our vicinity.
Then we should always remember one sagacious claim
Never pay lip-sympathy to others
Because it will be found out sooner than later
But make use of compassion
And understanding as the basis of your conversation.
Our conversation should effuse positivity
Words which make others unhappy
And saddening should be avoided to the extent possible.
The body-language we reflect through our body postures
Also gives out our state of self-confidence and self-belief
Sagging and drooping shoulders’ demeanor is a revelation of negativity
Straight and upright postures give out positivity.
Thence we’re in the habit of distributing like we give out unwanted gifts
Advices and suggestions as if we are sharing
Stale sweets which nobody like taking
These should be given to those who are in need of these
Otherwise, all our efforts will be stonewalled with unpleasant results.
Self-important or pompous discredit others in front of others – a sigh so showy
To enhance their score of popularity
But factually they do not know that they are showcasing their vulgarity.
When somebody is condemning others unreasonably
That fellow should be heard with rapt attention even if undeservedly
There may be something positive for us to improve upon emerging
Even minor contrarian talk could produce results so encouraging.
Our conversation should be a admix of humor and sagacity
To make the atmosphere light and conducive
But we should avoid being verbose and talkative
To make the conversation dull and boring
Also never be taciturn or too much reserve
Which may be construed as being self-centered
So as to make others turn their back on us.
A soft talk is like a soft walk
Both could be carried on and on for a long spell
Without making the subject tired
Or to others around feeling bored
Besides touching the inner chords of our heart the most
Serene Water runs deep is a time-tested maxim
So is the discussion done with sincerity?