Happy parents themselves are disciplined lots
And present an example for their kids to follow
For the offspring pickup parents’ attitude
Which they see in their daily routines
Home is the place where current of free-flow of information follows
With no inhibition whatsoever
Including seamless discussions
On varieties of subjects without compunction
On family customs and traditions
Including transference of cultural mores
Being followed by the family from ages together
Where mother holds the golden key
To fine-tune the child’s upbringing
Her benchmark for progress for each child is without bias
Happy parents are the ones whose children
After their home stint
Get on with their schooling most methodically and successfully
After following all the norms as a necessity
Where parents are called to the children’s school only for receiving awards
Won by their wards
For their all-round performance above par.
Happy parents are the ones
Whose children come with solutions
To the problems they confront
And not become part of the problem themselves
Thus making the problem more confused and beyond solution.
Just think of the plight of the parents
Who is called to their wards’ school
For attending a session with the teacher
For their wards wayward behavior and dismal academics records
How depressing such parents feel indeed!
Where both parents and their wards get reprimands
From their teachers for their lowly overall performance.
Happy parents are also the ones
Whose children make them proud
Due to their professional acumen and competence
Who would be known for their children’s exemplary achievements
In all fields which count.
ON HAPPY PARENTS
Importantly, for a parent to be happy, it is essential that their offspring imbibe all the positive traits that are necessary for living a positively oriented and purposeful life. It is not that in this sort of life, there would not be any hindrances/road-blocks, these would be there, but how best these could be surmounted by the participation of children and the parents with mutual cooperation and understanding.
While traveling in a train, I happened to meet a middle-aged person. Seemingly from a middle-class background but with outstanding mannerism which I observed while interacting with him. I easily struck a conversation with him after customary greetings.
He told me that he has two sons. Both of them were brought up in middle-class home conditions whose only source of income was the yield from their farmland in a small village. Both of them had their early schooling in a Government run school. Though in financial stringency, both of them finished their schooling; the elder one could barely scrape through his matriculation examination. He was constrained to follow his parent’s profession of farming and was fated to lead a normal life.
On the other hand, the younger one was disciplined, intelligent, hardworking and was liked by his teachers and adjusted with the environment he was placed. By dint of resolute determination and consistent hard work, he scored a position in matriculation and then graduated with flying colours. He also supplemented the family’s income by taking tuition classes in the evening hours. His parents were very proud of their younger son. This fellow also confided that he was never called to the school due to the discipline attributed towards his younger son. On the other hand, they were most respectfully invited to the award-winning ceremony of his son’s academic excellence. Any parents would be proud to have a offspring like him, he said. While telling this, there was a shine writ large on his face. He further said that his son has, this year, qualified his UPSC for IAS. What a performance, I applauded! Any parents would feel utmost pride in having a child like this one.
From the time a child is born, the parents try their utmost so that their offspring imbibe all the value systems which may help them in their later part of life. It is in the family itself from where a child gets the first lesson in etiquette, good manners, family traditions, discipline, self-respect and the respect for the elders in the family? A child who, from the childhood itself, remains within limits in every way; may it be financial, norms of behavior, obeys natural laws and laws of land with aplomb succeeds in life.
Having learned our first lesson in various aspects, as listed above, our lessons in informal education to get initiation from our home. Actually, from our loving care of our mother including a loving pad of our father. Subsequently, our formal schooling starts. The parents want that their wards ought to be good in studies, bring in good results besides following all the norms of behavior and positive traits which they have taught their wards. Then after some professional courses, interviews for the career the young aspirants aspire for. The parents too help their wards so that they get the best whatever they aspire for and have strong inclination to achieve.
After having achieved what their children have got according to their potentials as well as their circumstantial influences, the parents want their children the following too:-
- Good career with growth potential. The parents want that their offspring get the good career which has good opportunity to grow in the career graph. This is only possible when the persons concerned works hard in formal education then learn and follow every lesson in the book in professional efficacy – both theory and practice.
- Adjustment in Married life. Then the parents would like that their grown-up children select a good girl of compatible and amicable nature who could adjust with the family and adopts all the norms of behaviour. Here the parents too have responsibility and a role to play. They should treat the girl married to their son just like their own daughter. This way, love in reciprocity will flow in the family just naturally.
- Successful Married Life. Subsequently, every parent would like their children married life to be smooth sailings. There should not be any hindrance in their lives. If sometimes, there arises any difference in their perception, the parents should give sound advice and settle the issues, so cropped from time to time, without any wastage of time lest it becomes nuisance thereafter.
Conclusively, the parents would be ‘extremely happy’ if their children are:-
- If their children are brought up in a disciplined manner so that they lead a disciplined life.
- Follow norms of behavior in schools, colleges, universities or in professional institutions going youngsters. The parents their offspring to get their education by observing all the rules and regulations and get requisite knowledge and other experience gleaned during their studentship. How happy the parents will get when their wards come out successful after their formal schooling and bring laurels for them.
- More than anything else, it is the discipline which is essential. I have seen how much parents feel perturbed when their children are found to be involved in breaking the discipline, moral and ethical turpitudes due to which they are called to the schools or colleges. The students involved in shoot out incidents is one of the glaring examples. How much low the parents of such children get after coming to know about their offspring’s involvement in such cases? Only the concerned parents can say about this, nobody else really?
- Get meaningful employment according to their merit.
- Get settled in life after getting married with a suitable girl.
- Parents will be happy if there is a compatibility in the family of their offspring.
- Parents would be extremely happy if their offspring are compassionate, kind, emphatic towards others besides looking after the elders in the family when there is a need.
- What a feeling the parents will get if their children grow up following the spiritualistic way of life.
The parents whose children are not only the elders in the family but also the older members of the society in large in whatever way they can are the HAPPIEST IN MY VIEW.
Following the behavioural pattern of an offspring will keep haunting us:-
- When they are uncaring towards others’ needs.
- When they exhibit negative traits towards others.
- When they show their arrogant behavior.
- When they do not pay respect to their elders or older members of society.
- When they have the exaggerated sense of importance.
- When they come with problems and not with the solution to the problems confronted.
- When they are not satisfied with what they have but continue to pester their parents for more without trying their bit for realizing what they want.
- When they pass on the buck and do not take responsibility for anything.
- When they are under the influence of bad characters.
- When the offspring behave selfishly.