OUR RELATIONSHIP GOES BEYOND BLOOD RELATIONS

 

RELATIONSHIP

 relationship

What we learn from our parents

We become ultimately

If quality time is given to our offspring

They will mirror that attitude outside their homes

Ignore them when paying attention is needed

They’ll themselves be spoiled

And will embroil in pointless turmoil

Negatively impacting the harmony at home.

Whence the spouses have differences aplenty

These ought to be sorted out amicably.

When the grown-ups progenies

Do not care their old-aged parents

And leave them at the mercies of elements

They are not the candidates

For the blessings of our Creator

And ultimately, they’ll meet

The same fate

When they themselves grow old

As Karma always haunts us finally

We reap what we sow ultimately

Establishing deep rapport between all concerned is a must

For a relationship for the win-win situation.

 .

THE MEANING OF RELATIONSHIP

Essentially, first of all, it is important to know what a relationship means. A relationship means having an association, affinity, liaison, a correlation for a purpose. In order to have cordiality and harmony in our relationship, we have to have trust with each other, compatibility, understanding, positive attitude, appreciation of others’ viewpoints et also that the relationship gets solidified and sanctified no extraneous force can influence that relationship. The extraneous factors could be in the form of bad-mouthing, misunderstanding due to some unfortunate incident, etc.

RELATION BEYOND BLOOD RELATION IS POSSIBLE BY THE GRACE OF GOD

It is beyond doubt that human blood holds no narrow sectarian divisions. The human blood holds the key for knitting a bond between the communities. Humans are the best creations of our God. Here blood relation or otherwise hardly matters. The following instance holds good.

A Hindu and a Muslim husband had kidney ailments and required immediate transplants. Respective wives agreed to donate their kidneys for their husbands. But there was the problem of blood group compatibility. The problem could only be resolved if each woman donated her kidney to the other’s husband. This was only the only possible way to save the lives of respective husbands.

After hectic consultations with doctors and husbands, it was decided to transplant the kidneys of each others’ donors. Thus the successful exchange of kidneys to both the patients (belonging to Hindu and Muslim) saved the lives of both the men. This proves that there is no difference created by our Creator. The differences are created by humans only – our own creation. Only the human mind holds the key. We all humans are linked with each other with a common thread with our Almighty God as the final arbiter and not based on any sectarian standpoint.

WHAT WE TEACH OUR CHILDREN AT HOME THEY WILL REFLECT THOSE TRAITS OUTSIDE

A few days back, I was witness to two incidents wherein I came to know how much the parents could influence their children positively or negatively. A revelation or manifestation,  how their wards display their general behavior outside their homes. It has been observed that our children imbibe those qualities which we teach them. Yesterday,

A student of 8th class was hit by another student on the forehead due to which blood started oozing from the wound. Necessary medicare was provided instantly. Both the parents were called to the school along with their respective wards. While deciding on the quantum of punishment to be awarded, as a deterrence, the head of the institute asked the student who was hit on the forehead a question; ‘Should we expel the student from the class for hitting you’? The boy respectfully replied, ‘No sir, I do not want the student to be expelled from the school since he will not be able to appear for the ongoing unit tests’ and continued, ‘this will also put a stop to his studies’. All of us were surprised after hearing the reply from the student. His parents too did not want the student to be rusticated. They wanted the concerned student to be forgiven and allowed to rectify his behavior and nothing else. The parents of the unruly student were influenced immensely. They repented for not giving right value system to their ward and promised to do so in future.

In the second case in point, it so happened that a student was caught red-handed taking money from other student’s bag. The concerned teacher asked the mother of the child if she had given her the money which was found in his pocket. The mother flatly refused having given the money! That is the example others too should set. Later on, the child confessed to having taken the money from other student’s bag and he promised not to repeat this in future. If only the mother had told the teacher that she had given money to her son in order to save him then it would have set a bad example. The boy would have been reckless in his demeanor because of protection by the parents. Even the father did not hide his discomfiture and wanted to refine his son. A relationship between the parents and offspring is, therefore, based on mutual trust and the parents should make concerted efforts to noticeably improve the behavior of their children.  

From the two incidents, it is evident that what we teach our children at home is reflected outside. If we teach them the traits of tolerance, patience, persistence and above all forgiveness, they will follow those traits and behave accordingly. 

PAST SHOULD NOT HAUNT OUR PRESENT RELATIONSHIP

There are times when we come to know some past event, which has the recipe of adversely affecting the relationship, just try to forget that past event. Or make it a habit to clear the air between the two parties so that that ‘event’ may not tarnish the relationship so assiduously nurtured and established. It should always be remembered that doubts and skepticism are the enemies of relationship.

EFFECT OF HIDING ANYTHING FROM OUR PARTNER

Never ever hide anything from your partner because if the reality comes to the fore after sometimes, it may come in the way of establishing cordially in the relationship. A chasm may be created by this thing even though seemingly so innocuous.

WARMNESS IN THE RELATIONSHIP

Lip sympathy will not help a relationship to flourish. A healthy relationship could be established only when there is sincerity of purpose in everything we are undertaking.

IN RELATIONSHIP DIFFERENCES ARE SURE TO BE THERE

It should always be remembered that in the relationship, there will not be rosy days always. Some differences may also creep up on silly pretexts, do not allow those differences to simmer on but let those differences be solved peacefully on the principle of giving and take.

DIFFERENCES SHOULD BE SETTLED AMICABLY

There are times when we come to know about things from others about your partner, then, the same thing should be discussed with your partner and confidence established for a healthy living.

It should also be kept in mind that relationship is not a one-sided traffic, both sides have to wear the brunt of the situation in which they are placed. It is not that one partner may put up everything and the other one is not caring. The relationship can flourish when both partners are enthused to live life with complete understanding and comes to each others’ succor/assistance whenever there is a need.

SMALL THINGS SHOULD NOT BE STRETCHED UNNECESSARILY

Sometimes we let ourselves swayed by small things which could otherwise be forgotten thereby spoiling the peace and tranquility of the household.

NO TRIBUTION IN THE RELATIONSHIP

Never ever pay back in the same coin. The relationship will run smoothly when you let go sometimes. It should always be remembered that peaceful co-existence is the key to the success of any relationship. The alacrity with which a difference is settled peacefully cannot be settled in anger or through emotional perturbation.

If and when some important matters which has got implications on the entire family, should be discussed and the final decision has taken so that no party feels let down by the final decision reached.

NO IMPOSITION OF OPINION

Never impose your opinion on your partner. It will boomerang ultimately. Both the partners should grow together holistically.

Surrender control, let the natural process come to play – total control may take the relationship stiffing/suffocating.

Let the opinion be exchanged in a congenial atmosphere – the opinions of other partners should be respected.

The sincerity of purpose should always be there in whatever is being transacted which has bearing on another partner.

There are times when controlling emotions and highly reactive situations have to be done, if the situation goes off the tangent, due to one pretext or other, it is bad for the healthy relationship. There should be a limit to this. This far and no further should always be there. One of the big spoilers of relationship is emotional perturbation. Never ever let it go off-tangent.

LOVE is a binding force in any relationship, let the fragrance of LOVE flourish in the entire household. It is a panacea for any relationship to be successful.

Learn to be tolerant and have the principle of let-go always. These two are essential for any successful relationship.

We should always see the life as a unit and not in a compartmentalized segment.

Develop the relationship slowly but surely – brick by brick and cementing it with the potion of LOVE, TRUST, APATHY, FAITH, BELIEF, TOLERANCE, LET GO ETC.

ADDICTS SEEK PLEASURE IN INTOXICANT WHEN THEIR RELATION DO NOT CLICK

There are occasions when we do not get our relationship in order, we seek recompense in drugs and other intoxicants to forget our state of the relationship. These, instead of making the relationship click more roadblocks are created in the relationship.

THE  EDIFICE OF RELATIONSHIP ARE CREATED BY MUTUAL TRUST

It should never be forgotten that relationship amongst blood relations, in the society or in the international sphere could be developed through our understanding by the instinctive connect without any discrimination of any kind. It could be the relationship as readers of others’ write-ups or exchanging ideas  spreading wellness amongst all.

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11 thoughts on “OUR RELATIONSHIP GOES BEYOND BLOOD RELATIONS

  1. Everybody talks about our relationship at our homes but we should never forget the relationship that we can develop for other unknowns – to whom we have not seen personally can establish really a good rapport.

    KINDLY APPRAISE THE WRITE-UP AND COMMENT. I LOVE YOUR COMMENTS.

    WITH REGARDS
    HARBANS

  2. Thank you for these pearls of wisdom. I loved the two student-parent stories….we always here how our values are doing down and these real-life examples give me hope and inspiration – for the future of our country and world. Thank you for the light you share. 🙂

    1. Thank you so very much for appraising the write-up and offering your invaluable comments. Our parents can do wonders by providing their children value system when it is needed.

      THANKS AND REGARDS
      HARBANS

  3. Dear Harbans,

    You did a good job, a good analysis of a relationship between people, be they blood relations or other. I fully appreciate your good work 🙂 Well done, dear Harbans.

    Have a great time, my friend 🙂
    Didi

    1. Thank you very much for appraising the write-up and giving your encouraging comments – coming from you speaks volumes AND i VALUE EVERYTHING YOU WRITE AND SAY SIR..

      WITH WARM REGARDS

      HARBANS

      1. Welcome, my dear friend Harbans 🙂

        Each positive contribution to this world (in thoughts, words and deeds) is a small step to make our world a bit better 🙂 – and you did so with your thoughts and words – thanks my friend 🙂

        Warm greetings from my heart
        Didi

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