HOW A HABIT IS FORMED AND REFORMED?

HOW A HABIT IS FORMED AND REFORMED?H

OUR HABITS

FORMING OUR HABITS

The habit we want cultivating

We’ve to get it by repeating

A number of times

Till it makes its lasting residency

In the conscious system of our

To make use of it

Without much effort

As and when needed

Thence there are the habits

Which lose their usefulness

And necessitate changes

With the change in life’s stages

Effective change takes place

When this change is tested and attested

By different practices and experiences

Under different sets of situations

Till it is firmed-up

And takes its place

In our consciousness

And bestows us self-confidence

And will to face state of affairs

As it comes

Without any notice to us.

Habit is tendency to act in a particular manner or pattern of our behaviour that we form after we’ve made in a particular way through practice. For a person to cultivate good habits, it is essential that he/she should have adequate guidance under a skilled Guru or Master who could transform the thought precepts or processes  of a particular person. If we are not able to do so on our own, we should take the help of a  Competent Master or Guru then we shall be forming our habit. Otherwise, we shall have to make our habit  by trial and error method in the environment  we are living. This learned habit may be good or not so good depends on utility or otherwise which this habit gives to the person concerned. Our formed habits form our behaviour pattern and we are respected or otherwise based on our habit, behaviour and attitude we imbibe.

SELF-REALIZATION IS ESSENTIAL FOR FORMING A POSITIVE HABIT

We should have self-realization first. In this our potentials and weak areas are to be known. Having realized this, we can bridge the weak areas and add the richness of our lives.

I am of the firm belief that while forming a habit we should learn it like Dhanshdhari Arjuna had learned by actually acting on the advice of Lord Krishna, to do our work without any claim of having done that i.e. without any attachment to the fruits of actions. While performing our duties we should maintain balance without any care for result of our actions. Also, we should make it a habit to see everything due to God. It may be good or not so good. Besides humans should realise everything is due to Him and He resides in us all. Need is to realise this fact through our routine habits that all beings are equal in suffering and in joy.  

It has rightly been  stressed in Bhagwad Gita: Always do your work, Arjuna, but do not claim its yield, neither think of yourself in charge, nor flee the battlefield. Balanced in your duty,    care to win or lose.

HABITS  KEEP ON CHANGING FROM ONE STAGE OF LIFE TO OTHER

Habit and its formation remain  changing  as we grow in various stages of our life through various experiences and practices/repetition.  We ought to be cautious, conscious with better perceptions we can refine our behavior pattern. This could also be possible by thinking and behaving in a particular manner so that we imbibe all the good habits.

HABITS CULTIVATED IN A BAD COMPANY OF FRIENDS

While we become prisoners of our own contradictions, we cultivate unethical and immoral or irrational habits, it is not possible that we have cultivated this habit merely by our own volition but could be influenced by our own kith and kin or our selfish friends. Today, I was deeply dismayed when I came to know about a student in our neighbourhood, who followed immoral way of life due to the lack of value system by the parents (The parents had occasional quarrels) along with appalling influence of classmates. All these dreadful influences had the telling effect on her and herself resorted to the habit of following immoral way of living, surprisingly at the tender age when a student should devote fulltime for studies. This habit formed proved very damaging for her.

Old habits die hard and if they are cultivated under the influence of our friends with doubtful integrity. Smoking, drinking and gambling habits do harm us physically. Then drug addiction is one of the worst habits which could prove very harmful.

HABIT OF DOWNSIZING OTHERS ON THE BASIS OF CASTE, COLOUR AND REGION

There are people who have the miserable habit of browbeat others on the basis of their caste, creed, colour and backward region or due to their profession.  This habit is absolutely unethical and uncalled for and should not be encouraged at all. Nobody has the right to discriminating others on the basis of ulterior considerations.  The sooner this habit is changed the better it is for inclusive growth and development.

HABIT OF CRITICIZING WITHOUT REHM OR REASON

In our routine life, we must have observed people who have the habit of criticizing others. When the matter is under controversial then criticism is welcome and wholesome but when the subject matter is simple and beyond reproach, then there are people who offer their criticism which are simply not called for. 

REPEATING A PARTICULAR ACTION

When we try to learn some good habit, we have to repeat it a number of times. It becomes a part of our daily routine then. But care and caution consciously should be exercised that this habit is not bad one – a bad habit is the one which is not liked by others. This bad habit could too be eliminated by consciously trying to eliminate it by good action model.

HABIT TO BE PERFECT

There are the people who want to be perfect instantly. We humans can be perfect through our perfect thoughts and actions. It should be our endeavour to reach to a level which is acceptable in the society we are living. By imbibing the habit of perfection in every act we perform, then, it may not be possible since we have our own level of intelligence, comprehension, acquired knowledge etc. A habit formed in haste, may sometimes be a futile exercise.  A habit formed with love as a necessary ingredient would prove to be a good exercise – an enjoyable process.

NEGATIVE HABITS

It has been observed that bad habits like abuse, telling lies, backbiting, criticising others without sufficient reason, exploiting, mistreating or ill-treating, etc. once cultivated get ingrained in our psyche and are hard to be eliminated.

There are the habits which give us a negative tag. The habits are:-

  • Having the habit of showing anger on any pretext under the sun.
  • Habit of having greed for having more worldly possessions.
  • Habit of feeling jealousy on somebody else’s well-being.
  • Having lust for anything more than what we actually require.

HOW BEST TO BREAK THESE HABITS

Once a bad habit has been formed, although it is not possible to easily eliminate these habit but if sincere efforts are made, slowly but surely, we can remove the gridlock of these dreadful habits by remaining constructive and realistic in approach. Care ought to be exercised that it is easily said than done but our sincerity in moving towards that end can make huge difference. Stopping giving more credence to negativity can help in uprooting a bad habit. This could better be done by analyzing a problem into small-pieces and dealt with accordingly with complete application and poise.

We should always embrace a positive change with our honest efforts for living a positive oriented life and get accountable for every change that happens with our self-effort.

In Holy Bible it has amply been enunciated: Let the thief no longer steal, but rather let him labor, doing honest work with his own hands, so that he may have something to share with anyone in need.

They promise them freedom, but they themselves are slaves of corruption. For whatever overcomes a person, to that he is enslaved.

CREATION OF SELF-BELIEF AND SELF-ESTEEM

It is in fitness of things to attribute our positive habits when we follow positive course of action. Positive habits enhance our self-confidence and thereby our self-esteem.

In conclusion, we can say that a positive habit can herald positive change in us physically, mentally and spiritually.

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Why should we not regret doing on daily basis but you have to do it anyway? (Question posed)

Why should we not regret doing on daily basis but you have to do it anyway? (Question posed)

Regrets are the expressions

Of our heart

Upsurge of emotions

Having done something

On purpose or design

Or just by quirk of luck.

While taking this question, first of all, I introspect whether to reply this question or not because it calls for an honest answer. We humans being prone to mistakes do commit these on daily basis. We should not forget that our actions are based on our thoughts only. If the action is flawed, it goes to prove that the thought which resulted in that action too is flawed. Both thoughts and actions are to be regretted – may be on daily basis or if and when committed. Therefore, telling that he/she does not commit any mistake is being dishonest in his/her reply because humans commit mistake.

Essentially, over a period of time, I have learned to minimize my mistakes; especially the ones which has got ethical and moralistic connotations. Contrarily, in the official capacity, I commit mistakes sometimes, since I am of the firm view that those who perform their jobs as assigned do commit mistakes as nobody is flawless in real sense of terms. These mistakes are really unintentional but this giving experience not to repeat them to the extent possible.

It should also be borne in mind that when we are at fault or commit a mistake, we should always ask for forgiveness or express regrets for having committed the same. If it on daily basis, then, why not?

But as far as ethical and immoral mistakes are concerned; the mistakes like:-

  1. Tellinglies. But I tell lies sometimes when it is forsaving some relationships or saving somebody else’s modesty or to save somebodyfrom being engulfed in controversies unnecessarily. Others may regret tellinglies but I do not since I am of the view that if my lies could save a situationturning from negative to positive then WHY NOT? Some people may term me liar, Isay to those fellows do excuse me.
  2. Beingfaithless to your partner. It is one of the gravest mistakes that a personcould ever commit.  
  3. Beingbroke because of one’s own faults. There are habits like gambling, havingdrugs, drinking etc. which are the sure tickets for bankruptcy. Here regrettinghardly suffices. Out rightly getting rid of these bad habits is need of hour.
  4. Aspirationto be rich by any means. Thereare the people who wish to be rich by adopting any means. This is a wrong wayto be rich and ought to be shunned, the sooner it  is done the better.
  5. Backbitingwhich I disliked themost – both the backbiter and the backbiting asa habit is very bad. A person having this habit should try leaving it for goodotherwise, it will bring about bad name if and when found out.
  6. Thereis difference between fiction and real life story are different. Iam of the firm opinion if we face the real life situations honestly, we neednot regret anything. On the other than if we think life to be a fiction thentelling lies, backbiting etc. will be resorted to – regrets or no regretshardly matter.
  7. Neverdisrespect others because it may be done to you too aftersometimes. Karma philosophy is relevant in this context.
  8. Regretnot been able to accident victim.  It should be our endeavour to help an accident victim, if you are not able to due to one excuse or other, it means due to you somebody may have died because of our fault of not rendering assistance when it was hugely required.
  9. Deceive somebody in love. When a person who just shows his/her love for other partner but deceives him/her ultimately. This sort of a behaviour calls for expression of regrets. It should always be remembered that love is not a one-time-expression but genuine all-time-expression. A person who deceives others as far as love is concerned, even the GOD who is an embodiment of love will not excuse such person.

Honestly, I try living within the confines of my boundaries as far as possible but sometimes if something goes off the tangent then I fully express my regrets for the same and try not to repeat  the same mistake.

*************

GURU NANAK DEV JI 549TH BIRTH DAY ANNIVERSARY (PRAKASH DIVAS) ON 23RD  NOVEMBER 2018 (OUR HEARTIEST CONGRATULATIONS TO ALL ON GURU NANAK DEV JI’S PRAKASH UTSAV

549TH BIRTH DAY ANNIVERSARY (PRAKASH DIVAS) ON 23rd  NOVEMBER 2018

(OUR HEARTIEST CONGRATULATIONS TO ALL ON GURU NANAK DEV JI’S PRAKASH UTSAV )

Guru Sri Nanak Dev Ji – (1469-1539 CE)

The Founder of Sikhism & The First of the Sikh Gurus

Observance of holy days and celebration of anniversaries
Have linkages with some important events or after the names of prominent personages

Who changed the eco-system where so ever they put their feet.

Guru Nanak Dev Ji, our most revered Guru

An embodiment of Supreme Being

A harbinger of deliverance

From our pains and sufferings 

Through His gems of preaching

A Messiah who made a huge difference

In our viewpoints on spiritual values

And showed a clear cut path to the humans

By meditating on Divine Name

With all the devotion

Thus remove the all pervading ignorance

With his teachings. 

His birthday is celebrated as Prakash Utsav or Guru Purb

In essence, life is a festival (Utsav or Purb) of highest order
A Day of immense value for us all

For self-realization through love, faith and absolute devotion

Besides rendering assistance to the fellow beings without any expectation

And gain knowledge about the Divine Truth for our liberation

By realization of Divine within

By the union with the Divine

And attain Divine Peace within

Which is the sole purpose of humans

Thus realize the aim of Guru Granth Sahib.

On the Gurupurb Day Diwan
Starts early in the morning hours
With Asa-di-Var
And hymns from Guru Granth Sahib are sung
Followed by discourses and prayers (Ardas)
And finally Prashad in lines (Pangat)
By the devout (Sangat)
Called Langar served to all alike
People share it with great reverence
And make this day; a day to reminisce

On the most auspicious full moon day – Pooranmashi
At a village named Rai-Bhoi-Di-Talwandi
Now known as Nanakana Sahib
In the month of Kartik
15th day of April in the year 1469
When our most revered Baba Nanak Ji was born
To father Baba Kalu & Mother Tripta
No one but our beloved Akalpurakh (God)
His observable mission for this Special Messenger
Of spreading ‘EK NAAM’S’ pious Message
And that such a person will make huge difference
For causes most dear to the society in general
Indeed a Shining Star on the horizon was born!
Of the Sikhs & the ones who believe in(Khalas) purity
Way of living now or in future with certainty
Gurupurb lasts for three days
A pious Akhand Path in all Gurudwaras
With organization of Nagar kirtan
Procession (Kirtni Jatha) is led by Pious Fives

(Panj Piyaras – the Beloved Ones)
With Holiest Sri Guru Granth Sahib kept on the Palanquin
Hymns from It purifies the environs the most
Spreading Its Message – the most fragrant
Far and wide making the gentry mesmerized
Gatka Parties displaying their artistry
With their traditional weapons.

 Babaji – the most benevolent of all
Our earnest prayer to Thee our beloved One
Let the spirit of this day
Remain echoing in our memory
Spreading Thy Universal Message
Of Uniting the Humans without bias
And ridding society of all ills and malice
Engendering brotherly feelings amongst all

And make our life sublime..

GURU NANAK DEV JI’S BIRTH ANNIVERSARY 

GURU NANAK DEV JI

The Supreme Lord sends His Messengers to this earth to spread His Message so that such Messengers make difference with their preaching to the world at large and change their lives. His teachings are so relevant that there is a definitive imprint of His teachings on the psyche of people and that is why His influence remains centuries after centuries. Those sincere devotees who have attained the certain level of spirituality can seethe Divine Vision.

Guru Nanak Gurpurb also called Guru Nanak Prakash Utsav or Guru Nanak Jayanti is celebrated with gaiety and enthusiasm by all those who know about Guru Nanak Dev’s contribution to the humanity in general with His preaching.

On this day Prabhat Pheris (early morning processions or congregations) which are taken from the Gurdwaras in the early morning itself and cover almost all the lanes and by-lanes in the vicinity. People sing hymns in His glory in this procession.There is air of tranquility and peace in the environs around these processions.

Guru Nanak Dev Ji was born on 15th April 1469 at Rai Bhoi-di-Talwandi of Shekhopura, presently in Pakistan. He was married to Sulakhani the daughter of Mool Chand of Pakhoke Randhawe village of Gurdaspur and had two sons named Shri Chand and Lakhmi Das.

Guru Nanak Deve Ji defines the traits of Divine Lord as: There is but One all-embracing and all-powerful Divinity, who manifests Himself first in the shape of all sacred words and then through the whole created Universe – Ik Onkar Sat Naam, Kartaa Purakh Nibhou Nirveir Akaal Moorat Ajoonee Saibha Bhaug Gur Parsaad. This is also termed as the Mool Mantra.

Divine Lord also is: The One who was real and self-existent before all Creations, who was real through all ages (Yugas), who is real and true now and who shall be true and self-existent for all times to come.  (Aad Sach, Jugaad Sach, Heibhee Sach Hanak Hosee  bhee Sach)

HIS LIFE SPANS FROM 1469 – 1539 A.D.

History is the guide to tell us that during this period many of the spiritualistic, cultural and progressive ideas came to the fore and fructified owing to the proactive role of Guru Nanak Dev Ji. These ideas are very much relevant for us to follow and get experiences in our lives. One thing unique in these ideas is that these are practical in nature and realistic; not based on mysticism and ritualistic. In many of His thoughts and deeds, during His sojourn to various parts of India and even in foreign lands, sheds light on His unstinted and clear philosophy that  AKALPURAKH  – SAT NAAM SRI WAHE GURU is the only TRUTH, a Truth which could be proved anywhere anytime.

THE PREACHING OF GURU NANAK DEV JI

  • The universal message of Guru Nanak Dev Ji was to reach a common understanding through dialogue and carry all along by understanding others viewpoints too without imposing his viewpoints on others.
  • The human body is made of five elements; air, water, fire, earth and sky and within subtle body lives mind which remains in perpetual instability. The body consists of nine outlets and there is also the tenth one which is attained through intense meditation on Divine Naam. This way ego is destroyed and man merges with Divine.
  • The old dogmas and unnecessary rituals prevailing amongst the masses gave place to progressive ideas. Service (Seva) and prayers (Simran) should be given more credence.
  • The Divine pervades within the body which is termed as Soul (Atma). It enables the body to perform its functions. This Divine Power pervades in the Universe called as Universal Soul.
  • He propagated the idea of goodwill and welfare of all without bias – for him all are the creations of Akalpurakh and therefore there should not be any difference on the basis of religion of caste.
  • The God is the Divine Husband of Creation and all creatures are His brides to whom He looks after without bias.
  • He taught that everybody should be truthful in words and deeds.
  • Three miseries of humans are: miseries of mind, physical ailments due to bad deeds and miseries created by nature. These could be removed by God through realization of Truth by complete devotation.
  • His preaching resulted in the intellectual and spiritual renaissance of the masses in general.
  • Humanism was given more credence with the idea that human beings are considered good or bad according to the deeds one performs and not on the basis of birth, caste or colour or region.
  • Religion should create harmony and not dissensions and hurdles in the path of masses.
  • Complete surrender to the will of God for the spiritual forward march should be pursued.
  •  
  • He taught the philosophy of ONE GOD – EK NAAM.
  • Bad traits such as ego, anger, greed, attachment, and lust should be shunned from our midst in order to lead a balanced life.
  • We should always be in the quest/pursuit of knowledge for our enlightenment. Knowledge helps us to attain salvation too.

The Holy Gurbani is a sacred treasure and has universal appeal, every verse (Shloka) while recited suffuses and fills with fragrance in the environment it is spoken and cures the illness of our body, mind and soul. Almost all the prayers are for the praise of our Akalpurakh in one form or other.

For Example: Gun Biant Kimat Nahi Pae!! Nanak Jis Bhavai! Tis Lae Malae!

Endless are His virtuous qualities; His worth cannot be appraised. O Nanak, one who pleases Him is united with Him.

This is the holiest day in the history of Sikhism. It is celebrated not only by Sikhs but also by all those who believe in His Holy Words. Akhand Path, non-stop recitation from Guru Granth Sahibji, Asa Di Var (Collection of 24 Stanzas written by the revered Guruji). Gurdwaras are specially decorated tastefully on this occasion.

Devout pay respectful tributes to Sri Guru Nanak Devji and remember His contributions for the spiritual upliftment of the common masses and rid them from unnecessary rituals that prevailed.

Equality of all the faiths and religions is a reality. His disciples were from all castes and creeds.

Guru Nanak Dev Ji’s premise was that those who do not know the true meaning of scriptures, cannot differentiate between good and bad; are steeped in egocentric pursuits. These people are truly the ignorant ones. There is no exaggeration in saying that main thrust of Guru Ki Bani is to remove ignorance, superstition and complex customs bedeviling the masses This also helped in spreading the message of goodwill besides engendering brotherly feelings amongst them without any distinction. Guru Nanak’s stellar contribution is for the wellness of the humanity as a whole and for the spread of this message, He traveled length and breadth of our country and abroad.

All the incarnations Messengers of God suffered while they were living on this earth because people at that time could not understand them. Such incarnations suffered so that we may learn the lesson for a peaceful co-existence between all humans:

GURU NANAK PREACHING IS MORE RELEVANT NOW THAN EVER:

While pains and sufferings are, in essence,  part and parcel of our life but when it is inflicted by our own brethren then it is more painful. What has been happening around the world now is nothing but painful. Guru Nanak has himself mentioned this “Unto whom should I tie up and give the bundle of my pains? The whole world is suffering from pain and suffering. Wherever I see loads of pain and suffering – NANAK DUKHYA SAAB SANSAR.

Guru Nanak traverses lengths and breadths of India and in the foreign lands, so he mentioned about the ‘pain across the globe. This pain and suffering could be ameliorated through meditation, he mentioned. “Remembering Him in meditation, a profound peace is obtained. Oaub and suffering will not touch you at all – remain in the sanctuary of God and no pain and suffering will ever touch you at all.

All the humans are our Creator’s creations but they are born under different circumstances and different conditions and different locations. But from the same LIGHT, we are created. Then why people we interpret scriptural inscription differently. It really pains me immensely.

PROPHET MOHAMMAD

Prophet Mohammad suffered immensely at the hands of his opponents in Makkah and in other places like Al-Tayf and Madina who knew His exceptional intelligence and integrity. Although he was bestowed with very good business, a happy family and helpful relatives yet he preferred the path of pains and sufferings. His opponents raised every conceivable hurdle in His path but he did not care about His sufferings but wiped off the tears of downtroddens. Although like Christ, He forgave them and followed Allah ordained path for the welfare of mankind. He gave credence to compassion and kindness for the needy.

JESUS CHRIST PREACHING

  • Jesus Christ preached the importance of having compassion for our fellow beings. He taught that kindhearted feelings should be there even for our enemies, Jesus was born in 7 – 2 BC and was crucified in 30-33 AD in Jerusalem on the orders of the Roman prefect, Pontius Pilate. He was born in Nazareth, Galilee to Parents Marry & Joseph. During his lifetime too he had to suffer at the hands of opponents on one pretext or other.

Christ preached forgiveness and mercy. He even forgave those who harmed him immensely. No ill-feelings for anyone absolutely that is the message given:

Jesus was the one who had won victory against material consciousness. He exists in the hearts and minds of His followers. He said, ‘I do nothing of myself, but as my Father hath taught me.’ Christians including numberless others who have indomitable belief in His preaching shun delusions and follow His ideals. His presence is felt through his teachings. Those who have self-realization know that in every speck of cosmos Christ Consciousness exists but only those who have vision can experience this. Christ Consciousness is a part of Cosmic Consciousness should never be lost sight of by us humans.

His teachings are so exhaustive, yet, if we care to follow the ones mentioned below, we can make our lives sublime.

LORD KRISHNA

  • Lord Krishna – the Supreme Personality of Godhead, who appeared on this earth as the Avtar (incarnation of Lord Vishnu) more than 5,000 years ago had to put put up with so many pains and sufferings firstly at the hands of Demon King Kamsa (the most demonist of all Bhoja dynasty. Subsequently faced evils in the form of demons like Trnavarta, Bakasura, Aghasura, Dhenuksura, Pralambasura, Kesi in the form of the horse, besides serpent Kaliya to whom he forgave and finally besides serpent Kaliya to whom he forgave. So much so was he disturbed by the demons that for the safety of his subjects he had to establish his abode at Dwarka suffused with fortification etc. In Mahabharata, Lod Krishna played a stellar role in the annihilation of evil in the form of Dhritarashtra and his sons especially Duryodhana/ Though the battle between Kauravas and Pandavas took a heavy toll yet truth won and evil perpetrated and pampered by Kauravas was destroyed ultimately.

LORD RAMA

  • Lord Rama an epitome of Dharma and peace. He was to be carbonated as King of Ayodhya but had to go for exile for 14 long years. During exile, he killed many demons who disturbed the hermits in their meditation. His consort Sita was abducted with deception by the demon king Ravana who represented evil. There was a ferocious battle between the two armies of Lord Rama and Ravana where the evil of Ravana was defeated.
    • Lord Budha who epitomized non-violence and peace throughout his life and spread his message of fair-play and tolerance through his disciples too faced many hurdles initially from his opponents while spreading the message of love and affection. Even his death is death after consuming a special delicacy offered by his generous host, the remains of which were buried.

It goes to show that our most revered ones suffered at the hands of their opponents then what we are? We should actually learn lessons out of their sufferings/sacrifices and live joyously and with empathy.

PROFOUND LESSONS THAT WE HUMAN SHOULD GET FROM THE MESSENGERS AND GOD INCARNATIONS.

We woefully opine that we are suffering pains at the hands of our opponents (those who do not agree with our viewpoints) just conveniently forgetting the untold sufferings undergone by the Messengers of God.

  • Bestow us enlightenment by removing ignorance through spread of knowledge.
  • The world of ours is in constant struggle between good and evil.. This is due to thrusting our opinions on others forcefully and consequent struggle. Then differing people resort to disproportionate violence result in loss of precious lives. No religion recommends this.
  • There is a fight between the truth and falsehood. This difference may be due to the different interpretation of scriptures but the basic thrust of all religious scriptures is good of humanity as a whole without bias and feelings of compassion, empathy, cooperation, brotherhood, and goodwill to be encouraged between all humans.
  • There are those who are the oppressor and those who are oppressed. The oppressor should introspect about his/her origin and should never identify himself/herself different from others.
  • Bad things could happen to good ones. This is a fact, bad things have happened to the good people but when this injustice should stop and message of goodness that is codified in all the religious texts made applicable in letter and spirit? The sooner this happens the better for the humanity as a whole. No human loss, please.
  • We should never forget that we have a common Creator meaning we are commonly related to our Him. Then why bloodletting for temporary gain – aagain which pains even our Creator!
  • All the main scriptures exhort us for co-existing with mutual cooperation and with goodwill then why misunderstanding and killing? Where all this will lead the humanity?
  • Be that as it may, let’s forget our small differences and live as creation created by our ONE Creator.
  • The message of communal harmony that Guru Nanak Dev Ji gave should be followed by all the societies so as to remove the discriminations in the societies. He had his disciples from hindu and muslim – a clear message of communal harmony which is the need of the hour.

EId-e-Milad-un-Nabi

EId-e-Milad-un-Nabi

This day is of huge importance

Since on this day

In 570 CE

Holy Prophet Mohammad

In the holiest city of Mecca

Was born

The One

Who changed many a lives then

And has been changing lives

Even this day

With his sacred preaching

The richest in contents

Which enrich our lives the most.

On this day

Devout sing hymns

With great love and devotion

In the praise of Prophet Mohammad

Which are considered very promising

For getting worldly

Besides awards considered heavenly

People decorate their houses very tastefully

And observe this day

As the day of reckoning.

Prophet Mohammad who considered kindness and compassion

The pillars of our strength

For us all

For the needy

And should be pursued by us all very assiduously

People also take out processions

Where prayers are recited very reverently

Along with the distribution of sweets

To the poor and the disadvantaged ones

An act which the Prophet liked the most

Thence there is narration of the life and other stories

Connected with the Holy Prophet

The Most Benevolent One

Reminds us of the kindness and compassion

Which He espoused so dearly

And all the teachings of the Holy Prophet professed

We also show our love and respect

For our own Holy Prophet

May His teachings

Remain influencing

Us throughout our lives through His teachings.

OUR VULNERABILITIES

OUR VULNERABILITIES

OUR VULNERABILITIES

The events which are unpredictable

Dangers may be lurking in any nook or corner

Waiting to strike us without any warning

How best to save us from this  happening most unexpected

Depends solely on our training

To face challenges without any whiff of air  of warning

As these are unpredictable

These are not avoidable

Lets therefore allow these come

And embrace our vulnerabilities

Rather than escaping from these

To feel connectivity

With the people of all hues

And open many vistas of opportunities

To cement our relationships

With unknowns

And remain honest with ourselves

For new learning and know-how

And strengthen our will to grow

By acceptance what comes in our life

Since avoidance

Makes us untouchable to change

That may have transformational effect on our system

Since embracing vulnerability may bring us experience

To reminisce till our life lasts

Enhancing our self-confidence

Brimming with self-love

Also to enhance self-esteem.

We tend to close our doors to unpredictable

Because of lack confidence

To face any event

That may befall unpredictable

By throwing fears and cautions to the winds

Face the unpredictable event head-on

Since the people in general

Will treat us the way we treat ourselves

On routine basis

Good intentioned ones

Treat others with respect

And distribute smiles

And embracing others with love

And not embarrassing with impunity

During their lifetime.

And those with ulterior motives

Distribute hate and snide remarks

During their lifetime

Best course is to let the current of happenings flow freely

Meet the contingency as it arises

Giving us experiences

Sometimes sweet and other times sour.

Our vulnerabilities are destined

Face them as we face the challenges of life

Instead of making these  adversaries

We should make them an asset

Thereby empowering us with love so deep

And take on thechallenges of life with self-assurance

Of course with God’s graces in abundance.

OUR VULNERABILITIES

Vulnerable means state of being harmed or attacked, physically or emotionally or both. There are so many incidents in our life which put us in dangerous position. For example, if we intervene in two warring parties, more often than not. We may be harmed or attacked by one party or the other. It so happened that an argument between husband and wife turned into physical beating. My friend tried to intervene and wanted to persuade the hostile couple to forget their differences. But what happened was not expected by my friend. The warring couple joined together and started abusing and beating my friend thereby giving a most relevant lesson to my friend not to intervene when fight is between spouses. We may be exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed which happened in case of my friend.

Vulnerabilities are unpredictable, that is, these cannot be ascertained beforehand and therefore cannot be fully staved off. However, if we have strong will or determination or strengthen ourselves mentally emotionally and spiritually, we can limit their effects. This way, we can take any call as inevitable, inescapable which cannot be ward off as it is destined to us. In other words, what would be cannot be avoided but we can just face the fact as it comes.

These vulnerabilities may also be due to our weaknesses. At times, we get entangled in unpredictable moral turpitude incident which may have unpredictable consequences for us; even impinging on our character and ancients. The recent revelations in ‘METOO’ incidences of the past are the fittest case in view in the context which may be due to due to muddled or tangled mindset.

SOME INSTANCES OF OUR VULNERABILITY

·        Breach of trust. All the business deals are done with mutual consent or trust between different parties. But when one party breaches the trust, we feel very perturbed. It so happened that I received a call that one company rep(with which we had made contract for providing us computer related services)had come to rectify the defect in the server room but this deceptive rep. crashed the entire system thus making the system dysfunctional thereby putting in limbo the important computer related functions. Thus a person to whom we trusted the most breached the trust and made the system unserviceable. This unexpected turn of event made me most disappointed since I had allowed the rep to have access to the server room but he breached the trust and also the clauses of the TERMS AND CONDITIONS. A lesson which I got from this unexpected turn of event.

LESSON LEARNED: We should never trust anybody and should not be taken in by others’ sweet sermons since we are always vulnerable at every step.  Many a times we could be victim from the unexpected quarters. Therefore we should always be wary and check the credentials of the person(s) who comes with mala-fide intent.

  • We become vulnerable because of our trusting nature. Sometimes, we get victimized because of our trusting nature.Those to whom you trust most, may stab you on the back. A successful ladyentrepreneur, running a boutique (Tulsi Creations in Delhi) paid dearly becauseof her unsuspecting nature. She was unfortunately killed by her own trustedaides.

LESSON LEARNED: Keep your keep eyes and ears open always even when you deal with somebody to whom you trust most. We become vulnerable when we are gullible, weak besides being immature to handle unpredictable incidents. It is, therefore, essential that we remain cautious, remain resolute in our will power to face and fight any unpredictable happening which may have disastrous consequences as nobody would like to remain exposed to any unpredictable or impulsive thing in our life.

  • Vulnerable witnesses in various cases. There are instances where the witnesses in criminal cases in the court of law get life threats and make their lives miserable. They do not come forward because of reprisals from the parties concerned.

·        Attack on our self-esteem by our own known people. When our self respect or self esteem gets punctured by our own nears and dears. We face unexpected and unpredictable attacks on our self-respect by our own friends and colleagues. This has double whammy since we lose friends and self-esteem.

·        When old and infirm are neglected. Our old people require our special care because of their old age or they could be risk of being harmed at their oldage or disability when they are not duly protected by their own love ones.They cannot defend themselves against attacks by burglars or thieves.  They remain vulnerable from all sides. It should never be forgotten that we tend to become exposed to the possibility of vulnerable after we reach our oldage due to physical weakness. When our own offspring to whom we have given our everything show no mercy on us. This makes us emotionally perturbed. .

·        When differently abled and gifted ones are not cared as desired. We have to be sensitive to the needs and aspirations of those who are not able to transact anything tangible on their own and are vulnerable at every step of their lives. It is the responsibility of those whose body and mind are sound to help those who are having some disability or other in the form of giving them needed care and protection including the right education so that they grow to be able to look after themselves and not to remain dependent on others till their lifespan. Such training could be training on computers, candle making, making of earthen items such as wicks, toys etc. making of bakery items and those who have attained proficiency could be trained to be trained cooks et al.

·        When our partner deceives us. In joint business deals, if one partner deceives or breaks the trust then the business venture becomes vulnerable and cannot flourish. For a joint business to be to be successful, it is pragmatic and practicable to repose the trust.

·        Government formed by different parties with different ideologies are Vulnerable. Similar is the case with the Governments constituted on the principles of COMMON MINIMUM PROGRAM to be reached which is agreeable to all its constituent parties. This sort of Government too is vulnerable by some parties for fulfillment of their political ambitions.

·        When our step-parents breach our trust. There are times when the step-children remain vulnerable to the whims of their step-father or step-mother.

·        When our own deceives us. We feel very concerned when our own relations to whom we trust the most deceive us and breach our trust which becomes disastrous for our wellbeing.   

·        When those whom we have looked after us delude us. Sometimes our own for whom we have given everything; our time, our finances, our energy deceive us thus erecting an artificial wall of distrust.

·        When some deceive their own country by selling the secrets to an enemy. We tend to feel let down when some of us selling state secrets to countries inimical to the country concerned for financial gains. Thus vulnerability to greed makes these people vulnerable or weak for some pecuniary gains.

·        When someone breaks the marriage bows for dowry. Then we have the cases of some women become vulnerable to the greed in the form of dowry and other precious gifts. Many a homes have broken by this vulnerabilities.

Conclusively, it could be said; while we cannot stave off what is store for us the next moment; we can at least face the fact and not just get frightened and lose our self-confidence along with our self-esteem. Who knows, facing our vulnerabilities may open new opportunities and new earn us more friends and well-wishers. We should live life as it comes and not live in fear of the unpredictable. Belief in self and belief on our GOD will make much difference.  

OUR PRAISE & CRITICISM

 

HAR

OUR PRAISE & CRITICISM 

The human nature is so very intricate 

We feel highly elated

When  eulogy for us is etched

When praises on us are showered

From all quarters; expected or so not expected

Reason or no reason hardly matters indeed

What matters adulation

From all quarters is our main expectation

Since we’ve appetite- for getting aplenty admiration

Praises and acclamation

May be sometimes without giving evaluation

To our merit were in possession

Or bereft of any merits or demerits into consideration

Thus throwing to the winds

The actual barometer of our worth.

Criticism which should be the template

Of our worthiness or otherwise

More the scathing criticism

More the hope of finding our net-worth

Initially when a person’s worth gets reckoned

Or before the person is recognized

That person has to face a variety of criticisms 

Which are construed as valuable tools in true sense of terms

Like more the gold is put in the red-hot furnace and then hammered

The purer it becomes in caret purity term  

Then this pure gold

Need nobody’s reference at all

For its sale-ability in the marketplace

Since it is based on truth

Which could be tested and attested

At any place and time

Similarly, more the rough diamond is chiseled and polished

The more it shines

And more cost it commands

Similar is the case with criticism

More the criticism

More the refinement

In our character and deportment.

Withstanding all the life’s thuds and thunders

Since our life is not cake walk altogether

It is all the more arduous

With challenges and counter-challenges hindrances to overcome

For a triumph and win praises

We have to overcome our adversaries

By strengthening our frame of mind

And steel our determination

To face the arrows of criticism

From any cynics and carping critics

We’ve to withstand these criticisms

With intelligent witticism

Combined with logical suggestions

With cool-headed mentality as our weapon

To mute the mouth of criticism which has arisen.

Healthy criticism should have our approbation

If we are blameworthy, it should have our acceptance without hesitation

With candid assessment  we should make necessary course correction

Leaving nothing which may evoke further criticism.

 Criticism objective should not be character assassination

A  figment of doer’s imagination

Then a biting criticism without any substance

Unbecoming of the dignity and stature of the person concerned

Like we hear the politicians

Hurling abuses and criticism at each other without rese*rvation.

We should accept our criticism gracefully

The same should be replied whenever needed suitably

Countering all the contentious points reasonably

With right spirit and openhanded

Feeling no grouse or whining against the criticizer

Or reach to the level as that of  criticizer

The one who is in total control of his mind

Knowledgeable and creative

Does not become, in essence, reactive

He wins the battle which is forced on him

And will have to fight it out himself

Rather than turning his back for more criticism

Or should not turn this battle a bristling war

Engulfing others too in the fight for supremacy.

Care ought also be exercised

That nobody is unnecessarily made the butt of criticism

One who resorts to unhealthy criticism

Should be made to realize his folly

So that he/she not criticize others unreasonably

But try living with harmony

With all the members of the society

With the bountiful graces of our Lord Almighty

God be praised for His mercies always

So criticism or praises should not make us tarry

From our chosen path of living with the humanity

With humbleness, tenderness and gentleness

As the three pillars of our to serve our society

Withstanding with utmost humility

All the criticisms and barbs with dignity

While improving in all the sphere of our activities.

OUR PRAISE AND CRITICISM

In essence, it has been observed that whenever somebody appreciates us, we tend to become happy without putting our mind whether this appreciation has been substantiated by facts on ground or not. In actual practice, appreciation based on facts and figures assumes significance for us since it bestows us inspiration to do even better by working hard for improving ourselves through our since sincere efforts and also to excel and our tempo our excellence.

When somebody appreciates our good deeds performed by us with absolute sincerity, we should offer that person profound thanks since on that plank of appreciation, we can get inspiration to excel. It has been elucidated in Holy Quran: If you give thanks, I will give you more.

Wrong appreciation is counter-productive since it makes us lethargic and pompous i.e. we tend to over-estimate our efficacy than what we really are. When this happens, we consider ourselves more than equals thereby not making efforts to improve ourselves to earn place for ourselves in the organization in which we are working or the society in which we are living.

Importantly, it is also a fact, in normal course, we should not criticize others since if we criticize you, you are in for criticism in return. Unreasonably judging others, without self-introspection leads to unpredictable  results. In Bible it has rightly been said: If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private; if he listens to you, you have won your brother.

Example: There were two colleagues of mine, one was very sincere worker and the other one was shrewd and knew where his bread could be buttered. He always made it a point to be near the boss and tell all the secrets which his colleagues were doing or not doing. In other words, he was a blue eyed boy of the boss. They trusted him immensely over others who were sincere in their job performance, were regular and punctual and always performed their assigned jobs on time. But when the question of appraisal and promotion came, the preferred one got raise and appreciation and the sincere colleagues did not get anything tangible. When the particular boss got transferred to other location, the person wanted to adopt the same stratagem/tact’s, as he was in the habit of but this boss was the man of principle. He appraised his past record and got him and issued him a stern warning to perform his assigned job sincerely otherwise face the music. That is the consequence of sincere work and the deceitful behavior of ours.

I have observed during my stint in service period and through discourses/interactions with others that we always learn through healthy criticism. It should always be kept in mind that nobody has ever improved with appreciation not backed up by professional efficacy and finesse. Healthy criticism affords us opportunities to tighten our loose ends or the areas where improvement is called for and then we can face the world at large with self-assurance. Therefore, criticism could work as blessing in disguise if we take course correction as and when required.

Conclusively, it could be said that we should never overact since what actually are cannot be hidden. It would be revealed. Rather we should try to improve ourselves by being a student at all times. Our merit cannot remain hidden. It will come into lime light. Then appreciation will definitely follow with the grace of God.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

DIWALI GREETINGS OF ‘PEACE AND PROSPERITY’  

DIWALI GREETINGS OF ‘PEACE AND PROSPERITY’

 happiness-04

When there is almost nothing with us

By way of worldly possessions

Except a strong yearning

In the deep recesses of our heart

So peaceful and quiet

When a feeling of inner voice

Comes out just involuntarily

Of thanks to our Creator

So very loving, without a shred of doubt

That is the moment of glory of our Lord so dear.

In the early morning

While walking

A cold breeze blowing

On the other side of the road today

I heard a voice

So very pleasing and touching heart strings

Diwali Greetings of ‘PEACE & PROSPERITY’

To the passers-by with great longing

A earthen wick by the side burning

It was surprising

A family of five

Had also gotten up at five

So early in the morning

I ventured to inquire from the couple, so full of joy on this day

What is so special today

That made you to get up so early

In the morning

He simply said

With utmost respect

Diwali Greetings of ‘peace and prosperity’.

Today Shri Ram, Maa Sita with brother Lakshmana

Had come back to Ayodhya

To their own subjects and relatives so close

After 14 years of exile

After finishing the evils

In the form of Demon King Ravana.

Without realising himself

That he and his wife

With three small kids in the toe

Were living in exile themselves

On the pavement with elements so diverse

And with open cover of the heavens above

On their heads

Forced, may be  by the quirk of fate

Best known to the family only

Yet all were making merry

Because that was the day of Diwali

A day when  Shri Ram had come back

From his 14 years exile.

A lesson for us who with everything 

Graced by the God Almighty

With all the comforts of our own homes to live

With all the security and everything provided for 

Due to His blessings indeed

Even then we live in hidden fears

On variety of  subjects/matters

Which are eating us from within

And robbing us of the peace of mind

Thereby earning for us in the process

The depression and stress related ailments

And robbing us of happy and joyful moments

Instead of ‘peace and prosperity’

If we try to live a life of satiety

we shall surely 

Be living a life Song of God directed existence

What we brought when we were born her on this earth

And will not be taking anything when we leave this earth

What we have is given here……..

I think the person

With five members of his family

On the pavement

With joy abounding

Is living a better than some of us

Who are living a life of fear psychosis

Of fears which cannot expressed in simple words

But are gnawing us every moment

A life lived without fear of unknown

Robs us of ‘peace and prosperity’

Which we wish others on the auspicious day

My prayer to our Almighty God

Bestow us with peace of mind

So that we can bring a smile

On our fellow-being

Like the character of my poem

Living on the pavement

Wishing others ‘PEACE & PROSPERITY’

I take him as a richest man around

Since he has got everything to give with a smile

Without much expectations.